I used to be terrified of public speaking. In grammar school I was the child who hated “show and tell”, or any sort of assignment that required me to stand up in front of the class and be heard.
And in high school I went through phases of horrible body dysmorphia. I was convinced that I had a terribly ugly face which, not surprisingly, caused me intense anxiety and insecurity. It also led to me to cutting off all the faces from my high school pictures. To this day, I have only a handful–if that–of pictures of myself as a teenager.
Back then, when I envisioned my career I knew it would involve helping people. I always had a longing to serve, and I often fantasized of being a pediatrician or a teacher that traveled the world helping children in need.
Some of that vision has come true. I did become a teacher (I taught 7th grade for nearly 10 years).
And now I’m still helping people as a spiritual career coach and spiritual teacher. But I never imagined how much public speaking would be involved in my work. Doing book talks, leading workshops, and retreats, leading Facebook Lives, and other various remote offerings have all been, in a way, a sort of “show and tell”.
It all has been quite a vulnerable stretch for me. As you can imagine, it brought up a lot of the old wounds from my childhood. And, even now, I often have a few minutes of total panic before I go “live”.
But this was part of my path of stepping into leadership. And this process of feeling the fear and doing it anyway has been one of the greatest accelerators of my spiritual evolution.
This isn’t to say that you need to become a public speaker as part of your leadership. Leading can happen in many ways. Perhaps for you it’s not about speaking, but it’s about writing a book, or being consistent with your blog, or teaching that new class that you’ve been longing to teach. Or sharing your art work.
Fear will happen as you step into leadership and that is normal. But sadly, this fear is why so many people hold themselves back from fully stepping into their vulnerable leadership. Especially if you’re sensitive, empathic, and perhaps have some perfectionism tendencies like me, leading can feel terrifying.
At the same time, if you’re reading this, you’re here to lead and you might even feel a sense of urgency to uncover more of your Soul’s medicine, your spiritual gifts and share them with the world.
This polarity of the fear of leadership, and at the same time the longing to lead, actually creates the friction needed to accelerate your spiritual awakening.
Join me this Thursday, September 10th on Facebook Live at 10am CDT, as I talk more about my experiences and share special teachings to help you embrace this leadership journey with all its vulnerability, boldness, fear and joy.
Remember nobody else has your Soul’s medicine and the world needs it.
I’d love to see you!
Blessings,
Lisa
PS If you can’t attend live, the recording will be available on my Facebook page (@lisaesp23) and on my website (under Free Resources/Soul Videos)